Have you ever talked to a stranger and really — I mean REALLY, connected with him/her? I’m not sure if it ever happens to people. But when it does, it’s nothing short of magical. I can attest to that.
It happened one night back in January, when I was on my first day at a new job. I first noticed her when she was building parts of the riser for the stage and I was standing in a circle with my fellow technicians waiting to be assigned a task. Besides me and another girl, she is the only other female theatre tech who was working that day. She wore a nicely-fitted t-shirt, jeans and steel-toe boots: the same outfit that pretty much everyone wore regardless of gender. But there was a certain flair about her that stood out to me (Or maybe it was the odd familiarity of her which I couldn’t quite put my finger on that puzzled me).
Anyway, I kept my eye on her —or tried to, rather— throughout the day. I secretly wished that we could be friends. We were working two very different fields, her being a stage hand and me being a lighting tech, and rarely come in contact with one another even though we were in the same space.The chance came towards the end of the day when I was asked by my supervisor to help her sort out some cables. We didn’t talk much other than our actual work, and after a short while we were at the end of our shift. I took my time getting my things together while she changed. We then signed out and headed out together.
On our way to the skytrain, we passed by Steamworks, a popular pub in Gastown. We decided to take a detour and went to visit a friend of hers who works there. Upon inquiry, she finds out that he wasn’t in that particular night. So she turned to me and asked if I still wanted to hang out. Heck, why not? I said yes despite my watch displaying some figure past ten and the back of my mind telling me to go home. Immediately following my “yes”, we were led to a small table through a rowdy crowd on a weekend night. I thought I had made the wrong decision. I don’t even know this person who I was going to drink with!But a yes is still a yes.
When we sat down by a wall of bookshelves at a table for two, I was starting to get intrigued at how this night could turn out. A friendly new face at a new place. As far as I was concerned, I was networking with an experienced technician. And networking is always a plus in this industry. Thus began our new-found friendship. We sat facing each other and asked questions. Unavoidably, awkward silences filled the time in between our quest of getting to know each other. Awkward in a good way (I don’t know if that even makes sense) because smiles would creep up the corners of our mouths. I was mesmerized by this woman who contained a sort of mysterious stature. I felt that I’ve met this stranger before… in my dreams? or was it deja vu?
She surprised me when she said she graduated from the theatre production program at SFU not too long ago. Ah, no wonder! We have probably worked on some production together! We discussed the possibility but could not recall any specific instances. But my instinct was right. We at least have a shared knowledge of what our post-secondary education is like. We shared the same faculty and worked in the same facility for the span of the 4 years that we obtained our degree. Did this night of bonding with a stranger just get better or what?
I shared with her my distaste for the theatre production program and my lack of knowledge of the beers that Steamworks served. She laughed at my lone drunk story, and in turn she told me about the jist of her life. Our silences turned into inarticulate understanding of each other’s lives. It was truly magical. After a pint of beer we each had, we called it a night.
Strangely enough, I could not remember what she looked like on the way home. The smile that mesmerized me for the past hour disappeared from my memory. In addition to that, I was uncertain when I’d see my new friend again. She wasn’t working the next day, and our relationship is still just beginning that it would probably seem like I was coming onto her if I asked her to have a drink with me again.
As soon as I got home, I went through the entire folder of programs I’d saved from working on or seeing shows. I found all the past dance ones at SFU, but I was missing THE one. I was so sure that our names would appear on the same page though I couldn’t exactly remember what I did for the show.
With that missing link, I did a very stalker-ish thing the next day and stole her contact info off the time log sheets at work. I didn’t know what she would think if I called her out of the blue, especially since she didn’t exactly release her phone number to me.
But I was longing for someting more. Something this intriguing doesn’t just happen for no reason. I had to do something. I decided I would text her on opening night, despite her expressed dislike for texts. Still, it was the only way I could keep this relationship going. So I did. She thanked me for it. Further communication were made via facebook thence.
And now, before we could advance our friendship further, she’s embarking on a months long trip to South East Asia. I’m at a loss of sound advice for her. I am surprised to find myself feeling sad to have a friend who I’ve spent less than a day’s time go away for so long. Or am I sad because I am not able/ do not have the courage to do what she’s about to do?
Either way, I still feel that we are somewhat mysterious semi-strangers, yet it’s like I’m losing a dear friend to hang out with over the summer. I know she’ll make great discoveries over the course of her amazing trip, and that she’ll come back a different person. But that doesn’t changed the fact that I am officially bummed out :(
